Sunday, May 21, 2006

Intolerable Acts of Cruelty

Ah, the lame opening act at a concert. You can’t avoid it, and sometimes its fun to make fun of. But when they are really horrendous, they’re worth blogging about.

KT and I went to see her favorite band, Live this weekend. She loves Live - she’s a friend of Live - she’s a little scary about Live.

Side note: KT has turned into a metal head and I don’t know how, considering how she’s always been more of the new wave alternative type. But now, she listens to SQUIZZ on her XM radio in the car, and keeps cranking up songs that I never thought she would like. I have not only heard her say how much she likes Tool and System of a Down, but after the show she cranked up a Rob Zombie tune! ROB FREAKIN’ ZOMBIE!!! I’m not complaining, because I like a lot of the stuff she’s getting into. In fact, I told her there’s a whole bunch of CDs in my collection that I’d like to re-introduce her to now that her tastes are changing. But I just kinda sat there wondering if I was in the right place for a minute. She’s still adorable!

Anyway, there was no opening act listed on the ticket, but that didn’t stop some dork named Robert Shapiro (no, a different one) from hauling his band of insomnia alleviators onto the stage to help me recall other lame bands I’ve seen without choice in years past.

I can’t really tell you too much about the Shapiro bunch, other than their music was the elevator step-child of every boring song to come out of Rick Springfield, Bruce Springsteen, Hall & Oats, and Dave Matthews. Lots of strummy guitar and irrelevant vocals that could only make one wonder how the hell these guys got this gig. The bass player was WAY too into the songs, thrashing his head back and forth and literally doing bicycle kicks during this incredibly tranquil set. Not sure what he was listening to on his earpiece, but it wasn’t what I was hearing. People were literally laughing at him and completely embarrassed for him.

This is the worst opening act I’ve seen since the Vel-Cro’s opened for Van Halen in 1984. What are your most memorable pathetic opening acts?

3 comments:

Nichelle said...

Don't really remember since I was not at my seat during the opening act (getting various refreshments/going to the bathroom/chatting outside w/ my friends...anything to miss the opening band). They usually suck anyway.

Princess Katy said...

Okay, yes, I worship in the church of Ed Kowalczyk, but anyone who has seen LIVE, live knows that he is an incredibly charismatic man! And yes, I have become a metalhead.
What can I say?

Derek Knight said...

I saw Metallica and Guns N' Roses at Mile High in '92 and, because they had to rearrange things because Hetfield got torched, Faith No More couldn't open...Unfortunately, Ice-T's Body Count did...and they sucked.

Everything you ever wanted to know about Pat Angello - sorry!